diabetic.

can you handle it?
the bitterness. this irrational disgust of contentment.
Can you handle, that I'm weak and insecure and all I want is attention.
And I will tell you I am suicidal just to provoke sympathy. Or that my mother is crazy because I know yours is too. So maybe we could be best buddies and cry together.
Can you handle it, that I only pretend to love what you say. That I do not even understand what you are saying. That maybe I think you are lame and I just feel so sorry for you.
I have had these fantasies where I take your pretentious words and make a noose with them, then I slip it around your pen (neck) and tighten it till no further sound escapes.

I think about how I am better than you. I think about it all the time.
How I can tell when you are lying but you don't know that all I do is lie.
When I say I don't mean the hurtful things I said last night, I am only trying to keep you an inch away from suicide. After all I do not want to lose my audience.

I don't care if you dog is sick
or you are slowly dying.
All I really want is your currency.
I am planning to burn that house we share.
I will start with where you hide your guns.
The one you were going to kill the president with.
And you thought I wasn't listening.

I will put your dog to sleep first before I leave her there, inside.

I will let you sleep, too.